Sometimes we don’t fully realize the impact of an experience until later. In point of fact, nine times out of ten, this is true. What was the impact on your life of that first love? The loss of a loved one? Or even that falling out you had with your boss or family member or friend? Sometimes it takes years for us to fully comprehend the full ramifications of the events of our lives.

I am still processing my experience in Barcelona, the class, the teachings, the people I met. But it was the events that have unfolded from the time I left the class that have confirmed the power of that period.

The series of movements we learned in Barcelona are not particularly complicated but the entire sequence is very lengthy so there was a lot to remember. For the first couple of days, I felt fairly lost, but having taken classes with Lujan before, I did my best to relax, knowing that clarification would take place in due time. And that did indeed happen. Lujan somehow manages to weave all the threads together in a magical fabric of totality. With the help of Naomi’s fine organizational and note-taking skills, we were soon handed a detailed summary that outlined the series of fluid movement we were learning and which provided the all-important detail and sequence to this wonderful practice.

My intention going into the class was to practiced intense concentration, letting go of the personal, and fishing with a straight hook. I, too, felt the inner knock when Lujan asked, “Are you trustworthy? Can you be trusted?” and I searched my heart for the answer. Lujan’s teachings always touch the deepest part of me.“You can’t realize what’s in front of you,” he said at one point, “when your self-importance is in the way,” and “Let go of any realizations because it all changes in the next instant.” And later: “If you want to lose the illusionary self that is so strong, so pervasive, you must be willing to give up your alignment.” Wow. This one resonates deeply but my mind seeks clarification. Anyone?

So how did it all settle with me? In many ways and many turns. Here are just a few.
On the flight home, I knew the middle seat of my row had not been taken when I had picked my seat at the last minute. I had hoped that it would remain that way because I was one of the last to board and no one had yet sat down. But then suddenly a tall young man strode down the aisle, stood looking down at me with kind eyes and took the seat. After watching a brief animated film on meditation, (an app on Air Canada’s website), he promptly fell into a deep sleep. When he finally awoke, about an hour before landing in L.A., we had the most incredible conversation about his work with meditation, consciousness, and with the founder of that application, whom he was on his way to meet. We walked off the plane together, exchanged hugs and information and I felt blessed.

I had a happily uneventful but long shuttle ride from LA to Santa Maria and another hour in my car to my home. It was 1:00 AM when I finally parked in my garage. I had noticed something in Santa Maria—a kind of swaying but chalked it up to flight lag. But as I walked around my house, I kept having the same feeling, my body kept swaying, almost like I was dizzy but without that sickening feeling one gets from dizziness. No, it seemed my body just wanted to tick-tock on its own! This feeling was so strong and so strange.

Then after giving my cat his requisite pets and hugs, I went out onto my patio into the warm evening and looked up into the nighttime sky to view my favorite summer constellations shining from their home in the South. And there from Sagittarius’s spout came a thick cloud of “steam,” the magnificent Milky Way, a swarm of starlight rising slowly up to the zenith. And it seemed to me that I had never seen the stars shine with such brightness, such clarity, and there too between the Teapot and the heart of the great Scorpion, Saturn shining bravely (some would say stubbornly) with its steady yellow light. And I thought of Lujan and how before my flight from Barcelona, as I wondered in the small cafe looking for a place to sit, I saw him, motioning for me to come over…

Why am I sharing this? After all, there is a voice that whispers I may lose the power of my realizations from having shared them, and my fleeting confirmations may slide into heavy validations, my ego-seeking self raising its ever present head like a snake up to no good. So my intent is to share for two reasons that I can name—one, to show the way, the force of Lujan’s teachings, and also to codify the experience for myself so that I can continue to integrate what I experienced and am still experiencing into a totality. For after all, these are only the immediate effects!

Especially to those of you who are new to these classes, know that the movements Lujan shares have power, a power that must not be used for personal gain, but rather to open one to true knowledge of the self and to the beauty of others, of life. Don’t give up if you don’t seem to “feel” anything when completing the movements, don’t get discouraged over the time it takes, don’t listen to the little voice that says, “You’re wasting your time. Get on with your day.” Instead just keep practicing: every day, every week, every month, every year.

Words are paltry substitutions in this terrain we are walking now: the landscape of the unexplored, the unexpected, this journey to consciousness, yet we use them to connect to each other, to communion, and I know you realize that what I’m trying to say is know that the results of these practices are powerful and incremental, subtle but cumulative. In short, Lujan’s teachings work.

I write for you, my friends, that your journey will continue to unfold in untold ways without end. We are all so blessed to be a part of this family. Life can be so hard, and yet, Lujan has found us. We have found each other.

Again, a big thank you to Naomi and also to Jana who made sure that the event ran smoothly. And of course, my profound gratitude to the incomparable master teacher, dear Lujan. My heart is your heart.

Stay true, my friends. Until next time.

P.S. Bend your legs! ; )

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