Love Reaches For Itself Through The Cosmos

This application for the 2019 Parallel Perception Scholarship was submitted by Kimberly. This year the recipient will receive either attendance at the Gravity Series Workshop or participation in the Online Spiritual Guidance program. If you would like to offer your support for Kimberly please leave a comment at the end of this blog post.

Dear Lujan,
Thank you for reaching out into the world with your love. I am deeply grateful to have found you and your writings. At first, I wasn’t sure if I should listen to your work but I was drawn to you and the images on the covers. I am quite careful now who I read and listen to. I find I am protective about my own internal space where I feel my connections with the universe.

I easily absorb information and images and sometimes if that information is incorrect or slightly off it becomes more of a detriment to my internal awareness rather than being a support. When I found you I held back and felt it out with my grandmother guide who has been with me since my early twenties. She said your heart was kind and that I could allow you into my world and ultimately into my heart.

What I found was that I was not so alone in the world. Let me clarify. I have a wonderful husband, family and friends. I have people who deeply love me and I them, so I know I am not alone now or ever. The alone I am referring to was on another level.

I have done my own thing internally for many years. In my twenties, I felt guides around me and in my meditations would see imagery and work on internal issues of awareness and love with their guidance. No one else I knew seemed to do this but I kept on and learned to trust what I felt, and to hear and feel what they were imparting to me. I’m still developing those skills.

On their guidance I went back to school for TCM and then after graduation my husband and I started a family. Our children are now nine and twelve and for many years since their births I struggled to maintain my physical health. I tried acupuncture, herbs and supplements and did research on genetics to try and regain my strength, but at one point I could feel it was only a small step between where I was maintaining, and going into a decline that I may not have been able to reverse.

It almost broke me. I could feel something inside was about to give, something more than just my body. My grandmother guide finally told me directly. You either sit and meditate and prioritize the eternal part of you or it won’t go well. So I did.

When my children got on the bus in the mornings, I sat and poured myself into the space and the feeling of my heart woven into the cosmos. If I had nothing else for the day to give, I figured I had at least taken care of the most important part. Every day I sat and connected to my guides, watched, traveled internally, listened and explored the wisdom held in a vision of an energetic wheel that I had been given in my twenties. I got committed again to figuring out this holographic, fractalized, twelve spoked wheel that I was connected to, embodied, and was a place of common union for all beings of light to come together and heal imbalances of the earth and our communities.

After three months of meditating, I had the experience where I felt unattached to my life as it had been and also to any future outcomes. Internally I could see myself crossing a huge chasm in the darkness of the universe, no tethers attached to either side. It was unsettling but I let myself find my way. Almost two weeks later I felt I had crossed. It felt like I had made it back away from the edge of dying.

A year later I came across your work Lujan. I was used to this internal world not being validated externally. I knew that my guides and my own vastness was enough and that I could fulfill my soul’s giving by just what already was inside me, but listening to your experiences and words broke some sort of internal isolation.

It was like hearing your voice in a world that can’t be seen but that is a precious part of me, and I was strengthened deeply on many levels. I was reminded again that we all reach for each other, that love reaches for itself through the cosmos, through the beings that are with us, through our human hearts. This is our dream together.

I know Lo Ban Pai is calling me to help me strengthen my body again and to be truthful, I could really use the help to repair things I don’t totally understand. Today, I just read about the Gravity Series Workshop. I had to laugh since I made the decision to try to go before I read about it. And of course, I found there are many parallels whispered with what I am learning with my work on the wheel.

I know that your work Lujan has potential impacts for me on many levels most of which I probably can’t comprehend at the moment. Lol. I am also pretty stoked that you have a body in this 3D world- it does take some pressure off the interpreting thing. I know working with you will bring my internal world and my work to another threshold which is my life’s path to walk. I am grateful for any help along the way and I hope to see you in fall.

Many Blessings,
Kim